Memories are what old people live by. They literally remember their lives day by day and step by step and take apart the little details. It is at this time comes the realization of how much has been done wrong, how unreasonably time has been used, which can never be reversed.
Psychologist and writer Anna Kiryanova saw in the stories of older people one feature. It is a profound and accurate conclusion. And this is exactly what the younger generation should work with…
What will we regret in our old age?
The thing we will regret most in our old age is not that we did not travel enough.
Not that we paid little attention to our spiritual development. And not that we did not raise our children well.
And not about not devoting ourselves to the arts. Although we may regret it, of course – so write some psychologists. Who are still a long way from old age.
I have talked to many very old people who were quite sane. Most of all they regretted the fact that they allowed themselves to be impudently used.
And endured insults, undeserved and mean-spirited. “Why couldn’t I answer when my boss forced me to work for three people?” said one lady.
And another remembered relatives who came to visit her in the room where she was huddled with her two children and husband. They lived there for weeks at a time. And she did all the cleaning, washing, cooking, and serving food, as she should – though who should do that?
Some of them endured the cruelty of a drunkard husband.
Some endured the insolent demands of complete strangers. Not out of cowardice or cowardice, but simply, so as not to offend, not to hurt anyone.
To remain in the eyes of consumers as a good man. This was what everyone regretted. And they wondered aloud how now, from the height of their years, they would simply and quietly say no.
Hot water was given once a week. And on that day all relatives came to the woman with three children to do laundry. And everyone bathed, of course. And she had no time to wash and bathe her children. When she was ninety years old, she remembered it with bitterness and bewilderment, not about why her relatives did it. It was about why she could not find the words to say no…
She was very hurt!
That is exactly what we will regret – the time wasted in vain, the effort and sacrifice, the voluntary slavery.
About unnecessary patience – which no one appreciated. So it is not necessary to suffer unnecessarily. Then there will be strength and time for travel, and for children, and for grandchildren, and for art. And your health will remain. And there will be no bitterness in the soul – you just have to learn to say “no”.
That’s all.
Or just ignore insolent requests, devoting himself to art, travel or recreation. Or – raising children…
